Welcome. We at Focusing Forward are excited to invite you to discover ways to make all of your relationships better. Whether you are single, in a new relationship, a spouse, a parent, a friend, a colleague, a daughter/son, etc, we are all in relationships that challenge us at various times. Focusing Forward utilizes an educational coaching program from the Relationship Coaching Institute. With the right skills, guided by our Certified Life and Relationship Coach,, these challenges can be reduced from a "mountain" to a "molehill". We offer several exciting programs and techniques to help you easily gain these skills and implement them effectively. In addition, with the completion of the R.E.S.T. workshop series, single individuals have the opportunity to join an exclusive members-only internet self-match making site and our monthly mixers. If you have further questions, you can reach us at 727-443-4919 or email me at: info@focusing-forward.com I've been dating a guy for a while. He told me that he has had other girlfriends in the past, but that he didn't feel the same about them as he does for me. Also he said he hasn't been intimate with them like he is with me. I was taking care of his house/dog while he was on an extended business trip. While I was at his home, I found a Valentine's Day card from a female that went into detail about how passionate and loving he is and how dear he is to her. She goes on to talk about how she loves every precious moment with him and how she longs to wake up in his arms and make love, etc. There's no question that this woman is deeply in love with him and he has frequently slept with her. There was another similar card posted on his wall. It made me sick. Since he has returned from his business trip, he has no clue and continues to date me. I want to confront him, but I'm embarrassed that I read his cards. Should I just walk away from him or should I tell him how I feel and that I found the card? I can't believe I still have strong feelings for him despite what I now know. What should I do? Before you jump to conclusions, I want you to think of the following. Have you ever kept old letters from past loves? How long ago do you think he received this letter? I know, personally, that I have kept old love letters. They help me out in times of loneliness and in times of self-doubt. They remind me of better times and of what wonderful moments I shared in past relationships. Even though they are the past, they still bring a smile to my face. Before you knock this guy for cheating on you, a few things you might want to consider. Why were you looking through his things? Do you think he will have a problem with this? Even if you were over there to just clean and watch the dog, it's hard to believe that he left anything out in the open for you to look at, beyond the post card on the wall. If you really felt that it was okay to look through his things, what does that say about the trust you are giving to the relationship? Were you looking for something to find so that you wouldn't be surprised if the relationship didn't work out? Will he be able to trust you anymore knowing that he trusted you to look after his place but instead you looked through his personal items? As for the letter that was posted on the wall, have you asked him why he keeps it up on the wall? One of the hardest things in a relationship to do is keep an open mind. We often feel that we need to protect ourselves in a defensive manner when there is the slightest chance that we may get hurt. We tend to accuse instead of inquire. In order to do these things we need to calm ourselves down before we confront the situation. When you do talk to him, you need to remember you are there to keep an open mind and listen to his explanation of why the situation is what it appears to be. Then we need to try our hardest to keep our defenses down and logically use our mind, not our heart or our bodies, to figure out if the answer that was supplied makes sense. Listen to your gut, but logically use your mind